Community

I have always wanted to feel a sense of community with the gay community. I think more than anything, I want to gain friends that have the same morals I do. I have expressed this to my boyfriend many times already. I want more gay friends. And not just any gay friends. In particular, I want to have other couple friends. I want to go on double dates with my boyfriend and my friends. I think this expression is just my mature side coming out. Being 22, not many gays my age are ready to settle down, marry, and have kids. But I honestly think I am pretty close. I have found the one I plan on marrying one day. The next step is finding friends that share similar ideas to ours, and have gone through what we have gone through.

Now, my straight friends are awesome to be around, but I have always longed for having just a gay click that I can rely on. I had a small one in high school, but I can't remember the last time we hung out. So recently, my boyfriend and I have decided on trying to go to the gay bars more often. With this, I hope on finding a sense of community with the people at some of these bars. I want to be a regular at a gay bar, and have everyone know my name. That might sound kind of weird, but I just would love that.

I don't know if it is just because I have grown up in Texas, where the majority of people can be your friends, but not support your gay rights, or if its just because of the people. True friends support each other. I believe that when you hang around people that are just like you, you become a better friend yourself to these people. I know going to the gay bars aren't the best place to find another gay couple that could be our friends. Hell, we were at JR's, and when I went to buy a drink for my boyfriend, this butch bear type guy at the bar was just staring at the side of my head. It was really annoying, does he think that just because he stares at me, that I will say "hey, I have no standards, nor a boyfriend, so lets do it!" WTF? This is one of the bad things about gay bars. Some gay men are horrible when it comes to hooking up for sex. And this may be a big downfall for wanting to go to gay bars.

Friday was the first night my boyfriend and I went to a gay bar, just by ourselves, and I think it went well. We started the night at South Beach. They were having a foam party, so we didn't get on the dance floor. We didn't feel like getting wet. Lol. Then we headed to JR's where the butch bear was trying to get his way. I like JR's. I have been there two times before, and have not been let down. The drinks taste good and the music is good too. This was also the first time I was able to hold my boyfriends hand in public without being afraid that red necks were going to bash us. After that, we headed to F Bar. Its the newest gay bar in Houston. It was PACKED!! Seriously. There was more than a ten minute wait at the bar, and I'm pretty sure a Long Island Iced Tea was about $15. I said hell no. I was also getting a little claustrophobic. Too many people all in one place. Kinda scares me a little. I think I would like going there maybe on a Thursday or Saturday, but definitely not another Friday.

I am hopeful for the future of our bar scene. I think we are going to try to go out, just us two, once a week, at least. Thursday will be our next test with the bars. I have already found three bars that we will try to go to. I think these are smaller bars, and I hear they are friendly to outsiders. So as long as there are no people looking for hookups with taken people, then it should be a good night.

By the way, I am so happy that Raja won Rupaul's Drag Race. This was a great season. I can't wait for the girls to tour. I really want to go. A gay co-worker of mine has stated that my boyfriend and I better go with him, we will definitely be there! If you haven't already, pick up a copy of Rupaul's cd 'Champion,' as well as his new single 'Glamazon.'

"All men are created equal. No matter how hard you try, you can never erase those words." Harvey Milk